No dentures necessary.

Since I fail as a mom, I’m finally just getting around to bringing Anna in for her first dentist visit.  I’m not quite sure why it’s taken me this long.  Perhaps I was expecting to  be hauled away by CPS because, by some fluke occurrence, all of Anna’s teeth were rotting out of her mouth.  By all appearances, her teeth look perfectly fine, but what if the dentist started prodding around and discovered that my child’s mouth made a meth addict’s teeth look healthy? 

I mean, they are a little black.
Totally kidding.  The black areas on her teeth are because she ate a crayon.  I let my kid eat crayons sometimes.  Another fail.

Perhaps my dentist apprehension was because I was projecting my own insecurities on my child.  You see, I take great care of my teeth, and by all outward appearances, they’re very nice and healthy.  However, genetics threw me a curveball and made my teeth the kind of teeth that will always need upkeep.  I had many cavities as a child and young adult through no fault of my own (or my parents).  I’m just one of those fabulous anomalies who was dealt a crappy hand in the teeth department.  Joe, on the other hand, has fabulous teeth with zero cavities, so the tooth gods were obviously smiling brightly on him the day they designed his teeth.

Since I like my teeth and want to keep them, I’m always at the dentist making sure everything is looking A-OK.  If not, I pay a ridiculous amount of money to bring me up to code. 

I wanted to avoid this nightmare for Anna.

And, fortunately, I have!

My child had a great first dentist experience and walked away with a clean bill of health.  Zero cavities.  Beautiful teeth (even if they’re a bit spaced out like Spongbob’s).  And she blew everyone away by how polite and calm she was the entire time.  She really enjoyed the experience which makes me happy.  I don’t want her to have any negative associations with the dentist.  Even though we live in the south, I feel it’s pretty important to keep your teeth*, so hopefully we’re starting her out on the right foot.

*I was making a little funny.  I don’t think all southerners are toothless, just most of them.

Here she is being a big girl in the dentist chair.


And here she is smiling crazy next to the hippo.

Anna is ready to go back, so I’d say today was a total success!  We’ve now started the every six month dentist visit process, so I can reclaim my good mom card, right?