When I was a young lass, my mother had a short-lived fascination with the show 30 Something. I would be casually playing with my Care Bears on the living room floor and nearly puke on Funshine Bear when I heard the instrumental intro to the show. Noooooooo, mom, not again. Not 30 Something. These people are old. These people are boring. These people have kids and jobs and all of the other lame stuff that adults have to have to be successful in life.
These people are now ME!
I had a mini panic attack the other night when I heard Sophia mention the show on a Golden Girls episode. 30 something? I’m 30 something. How did I go from a snot-nosed, Care Bear loving child who thought that 30 year olds needed canes and Poly-grip to a married mother of one with a mortgage, a job and a birth date from a decade where bell-bottoms and 8-tracks were all the rage?
When did I trade my roller skates for a pair of Jimmy Choos and my Rainbow Brite purse for a briefcase (ok, I don’t really own a pair of Jimmy Choos or a briefcase, it’s all about symbolism, folks)? Did someone hit fast-forward at some point? How I ended up at the 30 Something mark without needing a cane or Poly Grip is nothing short of a miracle. I don’t have gray hair or winkles or boobs that sag to my knees. I feel like a 20 year old on most days and can still hang with a crowd ‘til at least 10 p.m. So, what was I so scared of? What made me think that 30 Something was old?
I’ll tell you what made me think that – youth. I see teenagers all the time, and when they talk to me, they call me, “Ma’am.” I am always taken aback by that because, in my mind, I am still a teenager. I no longer get carded. I no longer feel comfortable shopping at Aeropostale or American Eagle. I wonder if teenagers look at me like I used to look at the cast of characters on 30 Something way back when. Old, mature, boring, stuffy, plain, bland. Or do they look at me and think – wow, she’s kind of cool for a 30 something mother of one, getting old won’t be so bad.
According to IMDB.com, 30 Something only lasted for 4 years. I guess you can only be 30 something for a short while. It’s kind of like the Saved By the Bell kids – did any of us really believe that those kids were in high school that entire time? In real world time, they would’ve been 30 something by the time they graduated. There’s only so much you can do to keep up. I’d like to pitch an idea for a show to one of the networks. It’ll be like the Duggars except without the multiple litters of children. Something like, “30 Something and Counting.”
Who would’ve thought that my 30 something years would be the best years of my life? BRING IT ON 40 something!
I am not cut out for this
1 day ago